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I make significantly more money than he does as a resident, but I know that my job is secondary. My wife is living proof that they CAN be worth it. I think love and caring can be more important. We were "forced" to discuss things such as our deepest goals, desires, priorities, and for us, possibly most importantly, how we show love and also perceive that we are being loved. Maybe things would be have different if I had been older or if I had not been so fragile. This is because they gave up the structure of what made them desirable in the first place. She sounds so indoctrinated that like even if you try to get her to open up, who knows you might get like a BJ out of it doesn't sound like it but who knowsyou have to realize that a lifetime of conditioning will be set in motion in her mind that will make your life hell. I can second this, as a lifelong utahn this is why I simply have a "no mormons" policy for dating.
I just happened upon your blog I'm a doctor's wife as well - rural family medicine and I just wanted to agree with you that "have no expectations" is awesome advice. I don't drive and we live far away from our family. Many blessings to you. However her husband joined the church a few years after their marriage. When I complain that I spent two days without seeing him and when he arrives home just keeps on answering his phone as if he was at work The other day a colleague called just to complain about a patient of theirs at 8: These people have no sense of privacy. I don't mean to be rude, but she's not gonna give up her "nonsense". I'd suggest the essays. I know a non-Mormon guy who married a Mormon woman and has kept her beautiful and desirable, by encouraging her religious involvement, even though he avoided Mormonism himself.